My Promise

My promise to you is to remain true and faithful. My promise to you is to be strong and love you with all of my heart, no matter what this year brings. I know that the last two times you had to do this...it didn't end well. I promise that I am not her. I promise to not go searching for guys on the internet. I promise to not move another man into OUR home while you are a world away. The vows that we took were...and are...for life. You are my husband. My amazing, wonderful, rational, crazy, handsome, intelligent husband. I know that your past put you through pain, and I hate that you had to experience it, but I can do nothing more than to thank the person that never saw what she had, never appreciate the sacrifices you made and the hard work you put in to supporting your family. My family is incomplete without you. While half the globe may separate us physically, we are no further apart than we were when you were still here. You have my heart and I still feel you in mine.

I promise to honor our marriage. To put it before all other things and thank God for the wonderful man He blessed me with in you. I know it's hard for you to accept and truly understand how that can be true. It was hard for me at the beginning too. But what do we always say..."We are not them." And we aren't. You KNOW that I could never fathom doing the things that she did. I could never dream of having anyone else but you in YOUR spot. Your spot at home, in my heart, and in my life. There is no other you.

I know this is going to be hard. I've been trying to prepare for it, but until you jump in the frigid, cold water, you don't really know what it feels like. I'm glad that you don't have the same worries. I am glad that it was sad for you to leave. (Not in the sadistic way, but you get it.) It's taken a while to fix the cluster-funk she made in your heart, but we've done it. Trust. Faith. Knowing, without a doubt, that we are together. That reassurance, that belief, that relief in knowing there is no one else for you and no one else for me.

I will miss you so much. (Shocking concept to some military spouses who immediately try to fill an empty spot in the bed.) I will be "that wife" who uses your cologne as air freshener just to smell you. That wife who beams with pride when anyone speaks your name because I was lucky enough to be picked to be Mrs. Bennett. I will be that wife who remains strong, faithful, and true to the promises I've made to you.

This year will suck, but it is also filled with so many wonderful opportunities for both of us. You get to see some pretty cool things and, hopefully, I can come see you this summer. The means of communication couldn't be any better and as much as you hate it...I'm glad that you aren't in a combat zone lol. I know you thrive in a GI Joe situation, but I really hope there's no reason for you to have to pull secret squirrel stuff. Sorry. I'm just a wife who actually cares about you and wants you, not your SGLI, to return home. Crazy, huh?

So here it is. We start out on a new adventure together...but physically apart. I know there will be good days, bad days, days I hate that you are in the Army, and days that I actually laugh because I can do ALL the things that got on your nerves and don't have to worry about it :)

You are my husband. I love you. I love us and the life we have made together. So, I stand back and faithfully start a new countdown. A better countdown. The one that brings you home back to us. I love you more than words can say and miss you more than the tears on my pillow can express.

Stay safe, my love.